"If some lost soul ever finds this godforsaken website, they better start writing articles about our Bachelor degrees, I swear" -Squidward Q. Tentacles, founder of the Squidward Community CollegeSquidward Community College (SCC) is devoted to excellence in teaching, learning, and vaping, and to developing artists in many disciplines who make a difference globally. The Community College, which is based in ̶̧̦ ̟̘̝̺̩̜̬̬̤͡ ҉͖͔͔̩͙̠̻͘͜ ͢͝͏̳̜ ̧̹̬̙̞͎̠ͅ ҉̴̠ ̻̞̗͙̳̰̘̣͜͢͞ ̵̵̙̖͈͙̯
̷̴̛̝̼͖͇̹̤̘͉̲ ͉͚̤̖̝͈͔̯ ̡̛̜̣͇͍͢ ̸̧̡̼͔̟̩ ̨̲̞̘̥̭͈̭̻͞ ̴̡̨̻̮̙̯̠̬͓ ̡̙̣́ ̦̣̹͎̫͔̖̤̥ ̨̫̰̙̯̭͜ ̲̥̭͎͟ ̡̢̳̗̣̜̰̤̥̗ ̡̰̲͟ ͏̵͙ ̝̗͍̜̦̝, has an enrollment of over 300,000 degree candidates, including undergraduate, graduate, and professional students. Squidward Community College has more than 5,000,000 alumni around the world, including Bill Gates, Al Gore, Barack Obama, Mark "The Zucc" Zuckerberg, The Three Stooges, and more (see our list of alumni). See our list of excellent and internationally renowned degrees on the right of this page!
About us Edit
Squidward faculty are engaged with teaching and research to push the boundaries of art. For students who are excited to investigate the biggest issues of the 21st century, Squidward Community College offers an unparalleled student experience and a generous financial aid program, with over $2 awarded to more than 5% of our undergraduate students.
Mister Squidward touched my no no parts Edit
It has recently come to faculty attention that a hateful troll by the name of "yo fatass mom sucks giant black dick" is spreading false information about our organisation on the official FANDOM™ site for the popular HAIRSPRAY™ film. The defamating article in question may be read here. We hereby confirm that all of the information on that page (barring our name and the photo displayed) is completely fake and we reiterate that any form of racism, sexism, homophobia, ableism, classism, cringeism or other kinds of bigotry are forbidden on campus and are punishable by a two-week confiscation of the perpetrator's vaping appliances. We strongly condemn such hate speech.
The article in question tries to damage the Community College's top-notch reputation, by falsely painting it as a racist institution, affiliated even with the Ku Klux Klan. Clearly, such a hateful and manipulative campaign can only be the work of the dirty money-grubbing ((((Jew)))) Mr. Eugene "Shekelstein" Krabs ✡️, whom we have denied campus access, after five counts of bribery, attempting to set up a pyramid scheme in a fraternity, and smashing sixteen cash registers with his grabby claws after failing to turn them on. Furthermore, the very idea that we would be located in Africa is ridiculous beyond comprehension.
Our S*x dungeon info EditHere at SCC we go through lots of trouble trying to have fun from time to time, then Squidward Q, Tentacles (our lord and savior) decided it was a great idea to put in our very own S*x dungeon to get some love from time to time. Now students can have all the babies they can fit in to her.... you know what. Now that you know about the Dungeon, I wish you good luck on your journey to success at Squidward Community College.
Our prestigous (under)graduate degrees:
- Bachelor of Squidward in Vaping
- Bachelor of Squidward in Applied Economics: Cash Register Application Programme (CRAP)
- Bachelor of Squidward in Applied Economics: Tax Evasion
- Bachelor of Squidward in Chemistry
- Bachelor of Squidward in Nuclear Physics
- Bachelor of Squidwards in African Studies (ft. Professor Niqwa'd)
- Bachelor of Squidwarts in Bold
- Master of Squidwarts in Brash
- Bachelor of Squidwarts in Clarinet
- Bachelor of Squidwarts in Handsomeness
- Bachelor Class in Art
More information and degrees coming soon!